Fondue Fun and a replacement for Smoky Cheddar Cheese
First off, I am desperately sorry that I have not been blogging more frequently. Sad to say, writing about Condiments on a public blog, however entertaining, does not pay the astronomical wages that you might think and Condiment Grrl toils in a day job that has been taking its toll on her. And she's a little bitter that a co-worker was able to swan off to Holland for the same project that they're both working on, but he will be able to experience dutch condiments in full effect, especially those used for dipping those delicious frites sold on every street corner.
But I do try not to be bitter. Unless it's a tangy deglace giving fangs to a sweet meat.
Last week found me lurking again at the sample booth at Metropolitan Market because of one word - FONDUE WEEK! Okay that was two words, but let's be honest, I had you at fondue. Hunks of bread were emerging from a cauldron of smoke encased in a smoky cheddar fondue. Delectable! And then, a circle of glistening kielbasa appeared, drenched in the smoky cheddar fondue sauce. To paraphrase George Orwell, Super Plus Delectable! And conveniently, because this is how they get you to buy, they had the kielbasa and the smoky cheddar cheese stacked there for you to buy.
And the story gets better -- I am trying to watch my fat intake and I, like the good little consumer that I am, read the kielbasa package and discovered that the kielbasa has 65% less fat than usual kielbasa! Praise all the Gods that be forever and anon and stuff! And it was REALLY tasty kielbasa. And now you're saying to yourself, "Don't leave us hanging, Condiment Grrl, what brand was it?" Chickens, I'm sad to say that Mr. Mustard and I finished the package last night and I forgot to write it down. But I'll get to the store as soon as possible and buy some more, only for your edification, certainly not for mine.
Now, if you have all been diligent blog readers, you know that I am not supposed to have dairy. Yes, yes, I had my cornbread experience, but I really really have to be careful and I really hate having my crazy German naturopath yell at me ("Ze dairy will kill you!"). So, I couldn't get the smoky cheddar for the full fondue experience. While I was in the store, I scanned the condiment aisle, wishin' and hopin' and dreamin' for a smoky condiment substitute for the lactose intolerant. Nothing that would approximate my kielbasa experience in the store.
I got home and threw open my cupboards: I had to have something to dip my kielbasa into or my life was one long open pit of suffering and pain. Finally, I pulled a mustard that I had eaten before, but not really registered. Hot & Sweet Mendocino Mustard.
Now, we all have certain associations with Mendocino. Having traveled there periodically throughout the years, I think of it as a crazy stew of pot-loving hippies and craft craving post-yuppies. And they all like to eat gourmet. And it's a pretty amusing website and I am most impressed that they include testimonials and sell sample jars, which I have been complaining about. I'm now dying to try their seeds & suds mustard, too.
The hot & sweet mustard is just that and if I have learned nothing from my years of condiment tasting, it's that balance is everything. So many condiments try and combine different flavors to various degrees of success and sometimes it feels like they're just tossing strange flavors in to be able to sell to the widest possible market. But hot & sweet mustard is a very old recipe, harkening back to ancient China. And it can be done badly (see my blog entry on McDonald's dipping sauces). But this did something magical -- it combined the hot & sweet and created something more, something smoky, that didn't make me miss the cheddar cheese too much. And considering it's Mendocino and the range of interesting things that grow around there, there could be mystery ingredients galore.
I'm sitting here looking at the jar right now and wishing I had more kielbasa. Why did I share it with Mr. Mustard? Stupid Washington state and its community property laws.
Condiment Grrl
But I do try not to be bitter. Unless it's a tangy deglace giving fangs to a sweet meat.
Last week found me lurking again at the sample booth at Metropolitan Market because of one word - FONDUE WEEK! Okay that was two words, but let's be honest, I had you at fondue. Hunks of bread were emerging from a cauldron of smoke encased in a smoky cheddar fondue. Delectable! And then, a circle of glistening kielbasa appeared, drenched in the smoky cheddar fondue sauce. To paraphrase George Orwell, Super Plus Delectable! And conveniently, because this is how they get you to buy, they had the kielbasa and the smoky cheddar cheese stacked there for you to buy.
And the story gets better -- I am trying to watch my fat intake and I, like the good little consumer that I am, read the kielbasa package and discovered that the kielbasa has 65% less fat than usual kielbasa! Praise all the Gods that be forever and anon and stuff! And it was REALLY tasty kielbasa. And now you're saying to yourself, "Don't leave us hanging, Condiment Grrl, what brand was it?" Chickens, I'm sad to say that Mr. Mustard and I finished the package last night and I forgot to write it down. But I'll get to the store as soon as possible and buy some more, only for your edification, certainly not for mine.
Now, if you have all been diligent blog readers, you know that I am not supposed to have dairy. Yes, yes, I had my cornbread experience, but I really really have to be careful and I really hate having my crazy German naturopath yell at me ("Ze dairy will kill you!"). So, I couldn't get the smoky cheddar for the full fondue experience. While I was in the store, I scanned the condiment aisle, wishin' and hopin' and dreamin' for a smoky condiment substitute for the lactose intolerant. Nothing that would approximate my kielbasa experience in the store.
I got home and threw open my cupboards: I had to have something to dip my kielbasa into or my life was one long open pit of suffering and pain. Finally, I pulled a mustard that I had eaten before, but not really registered. Hot & Sweet Mendocino Mustard.
Now, we all have certain associations with Mendocino. Having traveled there periodically throughout the years, I think of it as a crazy stew of pot-loving hippies and craft craving post-yuppies. And they all like to eat gourmet. And it's a pretty amusing website and I am most impressed that they include testimonials and sell sample jars, which I have been complaining about. I'm now dying to try their seeds & suds mustard, too.
The hot & sweet mustard is just that and if I have learned nothing from my years of condiment tasting, it's that balance is everything. So many condiments try and combine different flavors to various degrees of success and sometimes it feels like they're just tossing strange flavors in to be able to sell to the widest possible market. But hot & sweet mustard is a very old recipe, harkening back to ancient China. And it can be done badly (see my blog entry on McDonald's dipping sauces). But this did something magical -- it combined the hot & sweet and created something more, something smoky, that didn't make me miss the cheddar cheese too much. And considering it's Mendocino and the range of interesting things that grow around there, there could be mystery ingredients galore.
I'm sitting here looking at the jar right now and wishing I had more kielbasa. Why did I share it with Mr. Mustard? Stupid Washington state and its community property laws.
Condiment Grrl
posted by CondimentGrrl at 7:57 PM
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